Why It’s Okay To Not Love Every Wedding Photo
Embracing the Authenticity of Documentary-Style Photography
ITS YOUR STORY, EMBRACE IT
As a wedding photographer working in a documentary, unposed style, one of my main goals is to capture the real, unfiltered moments of your wedding day. I aim to create images that reflect the true joy, emotions, and connections you share with your loved ones.
I also understand that you may not fall in love with every single photo. And guess what? That’s totally okay. Here’s why.
We Are Our Own Worst Critics
Most of us are incredibly hard on ourselves when it comes to photos. How often have you looked at a picture of yourself and immediately focused on that one thing you’re self-conscious about? Maybe it’s a particular angle, an expression you don’t love, or something small that no one else would ever notice. We can be our own worst critics, always spotting what we perceive as flaws.
I’m no different. I’m not fond of the way my nose has a slight crook when photographed from a side angle, for instance. I’m conscious of my receding hairline. I often look at myself in photos and judge myself based on my weight.
But here’s the thing: when we look at photos of other people, especially people we care about, we’re not scrutinizing their appearance in the same way. We’re seeing the emotion, the laughter, the joy. We’re remembering the moment, not analyzing every detail. And that’s exactly how your friends and family will view your wedding photos.
You Wouldn’t Judge Someone Else’s Photos the Same Way
Imagine you’re flipping through a friend’s wedding album. Are you zooming in to check if their hair is perfectly in place or if they have a wrinkle in their outfit? Probably not. You’re more likely to focus on how happy they look, how much love is in their eyes, or how beautiful the day was. You see the big picture, not the tiny imperfections.
Now, compare that to how you might approach your own wedding photos. You might zero in on things no one else would notice—like a smile you think looks too wide, or a candid shot where you’re mid-laugh and feeling self-conscious about it. But remember, those are the moments that make you you. They’re genuine, spontaneous, and full of life, which is exactly why they’re worth celebrating.
The “Perfect” Wedding on Social Media vs. Reality
We’ve all seen those picture-perfect weddings on Instagram or Pinterest—the ones with flawless decor, stunning lighting, and couples who look like they stepped out of a magazine. But what many people don’t realise is that a lot of these images come from styled shoots, where everything is meticulously planned and controlled. These shoots often feature professional models, elaborate setups, and perfect conditions that simply aren’t realistic for an actual wedding day.
In real life, weddings are full of beautiful, spontaneous moments, but they’re also unpredictable. There might be weather changes, a bit of chaos, or unexpected emotions—and that’s okay. Those imperfections are what make your day yours. A wedding isn’t a photoshoot; it’s a real event, filled with love, joy, and authentic moments.
Styled shoots are created to inspire, but they can set unrealistic expectations for couples planning their own weddings. Real weddings are about embracing the day as it unfolds, and documentary photography captures that—the real, imperfect, and beautiful story that’s unique to you.
Documentary Photography Is About Authenticity, Not Perfection
In a documentary style, I’m capturing the real, unscripted moments that reflect the truth of your day. These photos tell a story—one that’s filled with joy, excitement, and sometimes even the unexpected. But with this style of photography, it’s not about achieving perfection in every frame; it’s about authenticity.
It’s important to remember that no wedding day is flawless, and neither is life. We all have things about our appearance that we wish we could change. But those little quirks and imperfections are often what make us unique. They’re a part of your story. And when you look back on your wedding album years from now, those authentic moments will be the ones that resonate with you the most.
Let Go of the Pressure to Be Perfect
In today’s world of social media filters and carefully curated images, it’s easy to feel the pressure to look perfect in every photo. And especially in the wedding world, there seems to be almost an expectation to ensure every little detail is perfect – as if your wedding photos are the final product.
Your wedding day is not about perfection; it’s about love, connection, and celebration. Documentary photography captures the essence of those things by showing you and your loved ones as you really are—natural, spontaneous, and beautiful in your own way.
While you may not love every single image at first glance, each photo is a snapshot of a moment that mattered. Whether it’s a tear during your vows, a hug from a friend, or that unguarded laugh that shows your joy, these moments are what truly make your day special.
How You Feel Matters More Than How You Look
Ultimately, when you look back at your wedding photos, what you’ll remember most is not how perfectly posed or polished you were. You’ll remember how you felt. How the day felt. The excitement, the nerves, the laughter, the tears of joy—those are the memories that will stand the test of time. And often, the candid, unposed moments are the ones that bring those emotions rushing back the most.
In the years to come, it’s not just you who will cherish these moments—future generations will too. Your children, grandchildren, and loved ones aren’t going to look back through your wedding album searching for pictures of the bouquet or perfectly posed shots. They’ll want to see you—laughing, smiling, and surrounded by the people who mattered most to you on that special day. It’s the genuine expressions and the joy on your faces that will mean the most to them, reminding them of the love and happiness you shared.
The “Selfie Effect”: Why Seeing Our Faces in Photos Feels Strange
In today’s world, most of us are used to seeing our faces in “selfie” mode—reflected in mirrors or flipped on our phone cameras. When we look at ourselves in the mirror or take selfies, we’re seeing a flipped version of our features. This reversed version of our face is what we’ve grown accustomed to, which can make seeing ourselves in professional photos, where our face is shown as others see it, feel a bit strange. It’s something a lot of people experience but don’t often realise.
Over time, this becomes the version of our face that feels familiar and “normal” to us. But in reality, this is not how others see us. The camera shows your face as it actually appears. This subtle shift can make you feel like something is “off”.
Psychologists call this the mere-exposure effect, which means we tend to prefer things we see more often. In the case of our own faces, we’ve grown used to the mirror version of ourselves. So, when we see a photo that shows our features in their true orientation, it can look unfamiliar or even jarring. But rest assured, what you’re seeing in professional photos is how everyone else sees you—and to them, it’s completely normal.
Understanding this can help take the pressure off when looking at your wedding photos. The unfamiliarity isn’t a reflection of how you look, but rather how your brain interprets it based on what it’s used to seeing. Your loved ones won’t see anything unusual or “wrong” about the photos—they’ll simply see you in all your natural, beautiful self.
You Choose a Documentary-Style Photographer for a Reason
When you choose a photographer who specializes in a documentary, unposed approach, you’re choosing someone who will capture your day as it naturally unfolds. The moments we capture together won’t be staged or rehearsed, but they will be real. Some photos might be raw and imperfect, but that’s what makes them powerful.
There will be a mix of images—some you’ll want to frame and hang on the wall, others that may not be your favorites that you simply smile at as you move onto the next image. But they all contribute to the bigger story of your wedding day. And remember, those candid moments might not look exactly how you envisioned, but they’re the ones that truly show the beauty of the day.
Looking at Photos with Kindness as Time Passes
It’s interesting how, as we grow older, we often start to view photos of ourselves with a much kinder eye. A picture that might make you feel self-conscious today could look completely different to you in five or ten years. With time, we tend to focus less on the small imperfections we once obsessed over and more on the memories, emotions, and moments captured in those images.
The laughter lines, the way your eyes light up, the pure joy of the day—those are the things that stand out in the years to come. Photos become less about how we looked and more about how we felt and who we shared those moments with. Over time, the little insecurities we see now often fade, and what remains is the beauty of the moment itself.
In the End, It’s About Telling Your Story
In my opinion, your wedding photos are not meant to show a polished, idealised version of the day—they’re meant to tell your story as it really happened. So if there are a few photos you’re not in love with, that’s perfectly normal. No one else is looking at them the way you are, and they don’t define the overall beauty and joy of your wedding day.
So, take a step back and see your wedding photos for what they really are: a reflection of the most important day of your life, captured with love, passion, and authenticity.
Is Documentary-Style Photography Right for You?
While documentary-style photography beautifully captures the raw, unposed moments of your wedding day, it’s not for everyone. Some couples may prefer a more posed or editorial approach, where every shot is carefully arranged and perfected. If you’re looking for highly curated, magazine-style images with a lot of direction from the photographer, a more traditional or editorial style might suit you better.
That said, if you value capturing real emotions, candid moments, and the true atmosphere of your day as it naturally unfolds, documentary photography might be the perfect fit. It’s all about what speaks to you as a couple and how you want to remember your special day.
Are you ready to connect?
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SAM CHIPMAN PHOTOGRAPHY
YORKSHIRE WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER COVERING WEST YORKSHIRE, NORTH YORKSHIRE, LANCASHIRE, CUMBRIA AND THE LAKE DISTRICT; AND TRAVELLING NATIONWIDE & WORLDWIDE.
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“The best thing about a picture is that it never changes, even when the people in it do.”
– ANDY WARHOL